Women are now paying to have expert vagina massages
Look, we know that if someone offered you a ‘vagina massage’ you’d most likely run far, far away or possibly slap them. It just sounds like a front for ‘oi, let me finger you’. It sounds dodgy.
But apparently vagina massages are a thing – and they’re more than just a sexual experience.
Women’s Health brought our attention to the existence of vagina massages – also known as yoni massage and tantric massage – this week, interviewing expert yoni massage practitioner Isis Phoenix.
Isis explained that her treatments cost upwards of $300 (£200), and involve the use of herbs, steam, and massaging tension out of the vagina.
Which all sounds very interesting. But it also sounded like another one of those strange things happening across the pond in LA. So we tracked down some yoni massage practitioners in the UK to find out if women are really paying for the same experience over here.
Turns out they are. We spoke to Alexey Kuzmin from Tantric Therapy UK and Katie Travis from Massage Her. They both offer vaginal massage in London, promising benefits ranging from centering the mind and body, soothing anxiety, and self-esteem to improved orgasms and increased sensitivity.
Katie even suggests that by giving clients orgasms, the treatments can ‘reduce the risk of many types of cancer usually associated with women’. We’re a bit skeptical about that bit – orgasms have been proven to reduce the risk of prostate cancer for men, but we can’t find any evidence that they have cancer-fighting benefits for women…
Now, on to what tantric massage actually involves.
Katie told metro.co.uk that Massage Her’s techniques involve setting the mood with candles and incense. The client is then offered a blindfold, and the therapist will ‘very slowly and seductively undress her before asking her to lay face down, where he will begin to gently caress her whole body with very light touches.’
‘She will then be massaged from head to toe, including a foot and head massage. Her entire body will be massaged, leaving nothing untouched and stimulating her many erogenous zones, including light touches between her thighs occasionally brushing her vagina.
‘She would then be turned over on to her front where the emphasis will centre on her frontal erogenous zones including her breasts and ending with a yoni massage, which she will by this time, be yearning for. Our success rate speaks for itself; over 80% of all our clients become regular clients.’
Both Katie and Alexey recommend having a man perform the massage on heterosexual women. Alexey explains: ‘A tantric massage is not a mechanical massage – it is a holistic experience: physical, emotional, psychological.
‘I personally believe that clients experience the best response, comfort and benefit when a tantric massage is performed along their sexual orientation.’
If this is all sounding like a glorious experience, it’s probably worth noting the price tag. Alexey charges £140 for a three hour appointment, including a one hour consultation, one and half hour tantric massage, and half an hour of ‘post-massage conversation’.
Massage Her’s prices start from £250 for a one hour appointment and can go up to £490 depending on the service booked (we’re not sure what that means).At the end of the day, vagina massages quite clearly aren’t for everyone. They’re not ideal if you’re uncomfortable with the idea of being touched, and probably won’t work if you’re tense or giggling throughout.If you’re open to the benefits, though, we’d strongly recommend booking an expert (DO NOT TRY TO FIND A CHEAP/FREE VAGINA MASSAGE. BAD, BAD IDEA) and going through a proper consultation beforehand to make sure everything’s legit.